Two people were the victims of a robbery about 4 a.m. Aug. 3 as they walked on Oakland Ave. at Belleview Ave. The robber knocked down one of the victims and took a cell phone.

 It's funny that you read this account, and I feel like I somehow stole your old-ass cell phone from when the story was written. To help make me feel better, I offer this:

 

Friday, February 25, 2011 16135
Whether it's 2011 or 2015, unions appear to bring protesters from outside of Wisconsin to Madison to attempt to intimidate Scott Walker. Governor Scott Walker has said that out of state protesters now outnumber those from Wisconsin who are protesting the bill that would kill their unions. Real Wisconsin News investigated, studying photos taken at the protests. We found that not only is Walker right, but UW-Madison may be up to some of their old tricks doctoring photos to make the protests appear more multicultural. You be the judge: British police and an Asian mob? Scott Walker seems to be right.
Sunday, June 19, 2011 11725
I’ve lived in West Allis since I was born, and though I’m no mechanic or anything, I do appreciate a loud V8 engine. However, when I was watching a race last week, I started wondering how I could rig my Monte Carlo to make fire like the ones on TV. Obviously, I don’t want a rocket on my car—I just want it to send a little fire out the tailpipes when I pass someone on Highway 100. Is that too much to ask? So I went to Autozone and asked someone there if they had a device to make fire come out of my car. The guy told me they don’t sell such a product and that it would probably not be street legal.

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