In an effort to reclaim their good name, members of the ancient Vandal tribal group have sued the major news outlets for libel and defamation of character. “Just because our ancestors sacked Rome doesn’t mean we’re uncivilized today,” said Ulteric (no last name given). “And besides,” he continued, “all we did was pillage. It’s not like we spray painted ‘Pink Floyd Rules!’ on their frickin aqueducts.”

Ulteric’s assessment of his tribe’s sacking of Rome seems to hold up with historic evidence, which suggests the Vandals were only interested in booty while in Rome, similar to American male business travelers today. “We didn’t rape and we didn’t burn the place down. Jeesh, it’s not like we acted like the Romans… and we were in Rome, so we could have.” Ulteric and other members of the Vandal Anti-Defamatory Expression Regulators have filed lawsuits against all of the major media players, including the large media conglomerate that owns this news outlet.

Sunday, July 06, 2008 14877
Milwaukee’s Common Council has decided that its 2008 crackdown on violent and illegal fireworks was so successful that next year they will vote on a gun ban on the holiday. Milwaukee police focused on threatening to issue hefty tickets of up to $1000 for the discharge of fireworks, as well as up to 40 days in jail for not paying the fines. Parents whose children lit one up could have faced fines up to $1000 as well.
Sunday, July 29, 2007 24315
Real Wisconsin News is investigating the Mountain Lion/ Bobcat sighting in Franklin. We have taken a few photos of what we've discovered in the woods so far:

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