Real Wisconsin News is real good, but if you're looking for real news that's not in Wisconsin, not fake, and not actually news, then New Jax Witty is our little friend in Jacksonville, Florida. The news is in the form of researched opinion. And it has nothing to do with Milwaukee or Wisconsin or anyone there, except for the references to the area by a former Wisconsin resident who will be collecting his WI retirement money somewhere else. That doesn't make him a bad person. There's also some useful information for Wisconsinites on New Jax Witty, like whether or not a person who lives in Jax is called a Jacksonvillian or Jaxite or what.

Here's a list of some of the search terms that are getting people to find the new website about Jacksonville, along with an analysis as to why:

fort caroline georgia - Fort Caroline is in Jacksonville, but some people think it's really in Georgia

fort caroline history - There's a well-researched article about the history on the website, but the writer is no professor of antiquities

arielle nixon action news jax - Go ahead and check her out if you want to see why an article mentioning her is getting some action

hoarder cleanup kingman - this has nothing to do with anything from the website, but Google seems to think it does

florida has the worst drivers - actually, no, which is proven here

giant pickup truck - there's an article talking about why guys buy these, and it's as obvious as you think

arielle nixon - and there's the reason guys buy giant pickup trucks

pappy boynton - some confusion about the spelling of a famous war veteran in an article

jacksonville 102.9 - the alternative station that's more like mainstream 90s

brooklyn cyclones hats - not for sale here, but mentioned

brooklyn cyclones t shirts - yes, there's an article about hats, but not t-shirts

102.9 jax - more people trying to see if their favorite radio station is cool

jacksonville lizard kings - the old hockey team in Jax

brooklyn cyclones hat - New Jax Witty should just sell these hats

arielle nixon husband - she's not interested in you, so don't go all looking to see if she's single

jacksonville mabl - the Cyclones hat is for this league

adt abilene tx - there's an article about perceived crime and listings of cities with more crime

wittygiant - someday, perhaps

brooklyn cyclones fitted hat - honestly, there's a market for these hats

giant pick up truck - there is no evidence Arielle or any other newscaster likes these trucks, but apparently women in general do

witty.com - no, that one was taken

x102.9 jacksonville

jacksonville fl hip hop radio station - anyone who types that much as a search phrase is not crunk

x102.9

jax gis - one article discusses features the Jacksonville GIS map should have

fort caroline indians - the article about Fort Caroline talks about the Indians who lived in the region

witty - generally, it is

action news jax - for those not searching specifically for Arielle

102.9 jacksonville

puff nightclub jacksonville fl - we know nothing about this nightclub, but if it gets people to visit the website, then so be it

brooklyn cyclones cap - really, we should own stock

actionnewsjax - one word = more action

jacksonville ice hockey - yes, there's a team

 

 

Wednesday, June 18, 2008 32952
James Trebedeau and his wife Linda built their dream home along the Fox River in Brookfield two years ago. Now, they stand a few hundred yards from the home as a cleaning crew pulls out their furniture, paintings, rare Ming Dynasty vases, and various other items from the sprawling ranch. To James, it’s not enough that nobody was not hurt. “I worked hard for the items with which I furnished my home,” said the lawyer. “We lost everything, and all the news keeps saying is that people have been lucky to survive. What a load of crap!” Linda, a doctor who works in Milwaukee, added, “We’ve never done anything to deserve this. It’s not like we live in some project on Hampton in the core and expect raw sewerage in our house. We’re not dealing drugs here or stealing from others, so why are we having to live with my sister in Sussex?” Linda says that they cannot estimate the value of the items lost to the rising waters, and she was disgusted by the lackluster efforts of hired workers to save their possessions. “One little Mexican fellow waded in and pulled out an unframed Vitold oil painting with his greasy bare hands. And he acted like he was doing us a favor!” James was also disappointed with the relief efforts of various organizations. “The Red Cross offered us sandwiches on week-old white bread. Like something one of the workers pulled out of a metal lunch pail from the back of his pickup. And water… if I wanted water, I’d walk into my den with a Laliques decanter and scoop some up. I needed a real drink to deal with the carnage, not plastic-bottled city water.” The Trebedeaus built their home on an area once zoned as a wildlife refuge and natural flood plain, but reclaimed by Brookfield for expansion. “We bought the lot because it was on the other side of the river from the seedy townhouses going up, and it allowed us a beautiful view of the river and many of the mature trees left over after the land was flattened for development,” said James. “The only annoying thing about living here, until my home was decimated, was all the toads I run over with my Escalade. It’s a very peaceful location.” All the Trebedeaus can do now is hope for the water to recede and for some sort of Federal aide to help them rebuild. “I pay more in taxes than the average American earns in a year, and I expect to have a brand new home by this time next year,” said the lawyer. “And, no, it’s not enough that everyone’s safe. Brookfield owes me for allowing me to build here. The builder owes me for not building my house high enough to avoid flood waters. The companies who produced the pumps and sandbags owe me because their products did not perform up to spec. GM owes me because that piece of junk Escalade crapped out on me on River Rd. while I was going to hire some help—if a top-of-the-line SUV cannot go through a few feet of water without stalling, it might as well be Kia Sedona. And finally, the salvage company I hired owes be big for mishandling our goods while pulling them out of the water. All in all, we deserve much better than this, and even if nobody is hurt right now, someone will lose his meager livelihood because of this.”
Friday, August 31, 2007 6474
A 25-year-old man was arrested Aug. 16 on charges of disorderly conduct after he picked up a barricade and threw it in the street near Purim Hall. He was reportedly intoxicated and taken to detox. Don't let anything get in the way of your education!

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