Mere days after the company that owns Jagermeister liqueur accused the Milwaukee Bucks of using a deer logo too similar in design to its own deer head, Jesus of Nazareth has joined the dispute by claiming Jagermeister 's logo is not without fault. According to Jesus, "I said unto the people @Jagermeister in a tweet, 'Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.' I sometimes kind of imply meaning instead of coming out and saying it, so my lawyers have suggested I explain what I meant."

Jesus said that his legal team sent notice to Jagermeister stating that it's use of the Christian Cross logo was an infringement. Furthermore, it states that permission for use of the cross in logos for alcoholic beverages had been revoked, with the exception of red table wine and beers bottled by monks.

Jesus' legal team, headed by Adam Steinberg, added some details: "Generally, Jesus prefers to turn the other cheek when it comes to any misuse of Christian icons. However, Jagermeister's singling out of the Milwaukee Bucks drew the ire of not only the Son but also the Father. Quoth Jesus, "Dad was like, 'they have logo copyrights to a deer head? Next they will claim to own all the logos with sparrows or lilies of the field.'"

While it's true the new Bucks logo has some similarities to the deer head in question, it is also true that God is sick and tired of endless litigation requiring sworn statements. To a lesser degree, the use of religious icons for clearly non religious purposes has been a pet peeve of Jesus for at least a millennia. "I don't know what Jagermeister wants to say about Me, but to imply I support Jagerbombs and the immoral behavior associated with binge drinking is an incorrect assumption on the part of the company. At least the Milwaukee Bucks logo uses a cute implied basketball on top of the deer's rack rather than a symbol incongruous with their mission."

A spokesman for the Bucks said, "We were copying the Bulls logo and had no intention to steal any other logo. I mean, how many ways can a freakin' deer be drawn?"

Jesus agrees; sayeth the Lord, "The logo is not implying it's some kind of false god. It's just a deer with a basketball. This does not offend Me."

Monday, November 14, 2011 10258
In an effort to bring Wisconsin back together as Christians, Scott Walker saved Christmas just before the bid to recall him from office, and he is hoping that the effort will prove once and for all that he is the true chosen leader of the state. By reclaiming the Christmas tree from liberals, Walker has brought back the Christmas season to Wisconsin. The citizens had been celebrating a pagan festivus holiday for the past twenty-five years, according to Walker's aides. Walker said, “The New Wisconsin Order will allow Christians to celebrate a Christian holiday that's always been a Christian holiday in a state that's always been a Christian state in a country that was founded by strongly Christian founding fathers, with Christianity as its founding principle. And it says loud and clear that Wisconsin is open for business this Christmas season.”
Wednesday, August 01, 2007 9706
Rudy Giuliani says his experience leading New York after a disaster will be useful in leading the U.S. after Bush.

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