Rocky mountain high, Wisconsin! Yes, you’ve heard right. Now all the frost-brewed goodness is going to be brewed right here in the city known for people who forgot what it is to say, “When.”

Being the beer connoisseur that this writer is, seeing a merger such as this can only mean one thing…terrorists have finally gotten to the last thing that is truly holy and sacred in America.

Don’t be fooled by all the talk that this merger is what is best for the city and the two companies. Take Miller for instance, a good American cigarette company by the name of Phillip Morris owned it for a number of years and then sells out to company from South Africa. Too close to the Middle East for this writer’s likings.

Then once things appear to be running smoothly under this “South African” company and they decide with yet another American brewery so they can compete against Budweiser.

Think about it: if you were a terrorist, wouldn’t you be in support of having a beer nick named “the silver bullet.” Next thing we know they will develop something like a “Wisconsin Car Bomb” only it won’t involve the beer.

So, the next time your out conducting your own studies in the area of alconomics be sure and ask for something truly American…Wild Turkey!

Monday, November 14, 2011 10278
In an effort to bring Wisconsin back together as Christians, Scott Walker saved Christmas just before the bid to recall him from office, and he is hoping that the effort will prove once and for all that he is the true chosen leader of the state. By reclaiming the Christmas tree from liberals, Walker has brought back the Christmas season to Wisconsin. The citizens had been celebrating a pagan festivus holiday for the past twenty-five years, according to Walker's aides. Walker said, “The New Wisconsin Order will allow Christians to celebrate a Christian holiday that's always been a Christian holiday in a state that's always been a Christian state in a country that was founded by strongly Christian founding fathers, with Christianity as its founding principle. And it says loud and clear that Wisconsin is open for business this Christmas season.”
Thursday, September 27, 2007 15406
An 18-year-old female student was arrested Sept. 5 on charges of theft of a mathematics textbook valued at $77. The woman walked past the cash register without paying. When asked if she was carrying any items she hadn't paid for, she said, "Yes."

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