Walker's Republican GuardIn an effort to suppress DNR wardens and science teachers, Scott Walker has created a new Republican Guard for his administration. These are elite troops reporting directly to Walker. Since Walker is planning to enact systemic, widespread, and extremely grave violations of human rights, he knows he needs the protection of the Republican Guard from unruly librarians and DOT workers.

 

Walker plans on allowing full political participation for only the wealthiest 8%, and busting the labor unions is the first step in this measure. While the federal government still protects citizens' rights to assemble legally, Walker prefers allowing assembly only to express support for the government, and any slowdowns or absences to protest will be met with the firing of government employees.

 

The Republican Guard plans on creating check points in order to prevent ordinary citizens from traveling abroad without permission of Governor Walker, and females will need the escort of a male relative. Once order is established after the initial destruction of state unions, Walker plans to enact an Anfal Campaign against all labor unions in the state in order to lower the standard of living and create a business environment that is lucrative for the top 8%.

While workers in the state may be in store for harsh discipline if they do not work hard for less money, government supporters and family members will be immune from punishment for any such crimes. Reporters and government informants will be dealt with severely, though most reporters already make so little that they report their envy of union wages and benefits.

You will be able to distinguish the Republican Guard at checkpoints and in bodyguard detail by their red or Maroon berets and the red triangles worn on their sleeves. The new state motto will also be changed to, "With our blood, with our souls, we sacrifice for you, Scott Walker."

Monday, October 01, 2007 5543
Calendar Accurately Reflects Wisconsin’s Communities. In an effort to continue the popular multicultural tourism calendar, first launched in 2005, yet maintain factual integrity, the Wisconsin Department of Tourism has released a segregated version. This calendar will depict realistic scenes of Real Wisconsin diverse citizens in their natural habitats as opposed to staged or doctored photos to falsely represent integration. The twelve photos used for each month are as follows:
Sunday, September 18, 2016 19477
Nearly defining irony, the top-rated response to Americans viewing the Corey Feldman song performance in September of 2016 was, "I thought he was dead." Obviously, the second response, and the one that has become the focus of social media, was, "That was weird." While it is possible Corey Feldman died of an overdose or gross neglect in the late 2000's or early 2010's, a quick search of the internet seems to have proven that Feldman did not die. It's also not likely that his death was covered up in order to make a posthumous release of his album, which was dedicated to two of his dead friends, Corey Haim and Michael Jackson. "I was not dead for the past ten years," says Feldman. "I was just dedicating my life to my music." Unfortunately for Feldman, critics and fans have unanimously declared the album to be horrible. Said one critic, "I thought he was dead before the songs were released, and now I kind of wish he had been. The album is kind of like Eddie Murphy's 80s attempt at music, just without the one hit to make it somewhat meaningful. But that makes it a perfect dedication to Corey Haim."

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