ProNew York Governor and former Attorney General Eliot Spitzer became the latest victim of a Pussitocracy run amok.  In what is becoming a growing problem, over-achievers are finding it more and more difficult to get laid, and as a result are finding themselves left with no choice but to buy a piece of ass. 

In what is apparently yet another case of an overworked, undersexed leader succumbing to the need for a little somethin' somethin' that he couldn't get on the home front, Spitzer called for take out from The Emperors Club.  It is unknown whether he ordered egg rolls with his dish, but speculation is that he did request an extra serving of spicy sauce for his noodle. 

The trend of the Pussitocracy to not lay enough good men has been apparent for some time as Madames from around the world have exploited the hole in the system to gain wealth, fame and power.  Most notably, Heidi Fliess' prostitution ring gained widespread attention when hard working, but not completely buff men on the west coast couldn't get the time of day from west coast women.  Recently, the Sugarloaf Country Club Madames, Lisa Ann Taylor and Nicole Probert, exploited the Pussitocracy defect in Atlanta.  The Asian sex trade, Adult Friend Finder, the Chicken Ranch, high-speed internet and Amsterdam all exist because of this overwhelming Pussitocracy problem.

So, just where did the Pussitocracy run off the tracks and stop getting properly railed?  It is difficult to tell, but apparently somewhere between when women were transitioning from free-love to hitting the glass ceiling.  Women throughout the developed world have over the past three decades been abdicating their responsibility to balance the forces of nature and spread the sex around. 

As it now stands, the same guys are getting laid over and over, while many good guys go without.  This statistacal anamoly, tells us two things.  One, women are still having sex, which is good.  Two, they are doing it with the same guys their friends did it with, which, after you are done being turned on by that thought, is pretty gross.  What is ironic, is that these ladies who fuck the same guys their friends did still complain about not being able to find a guy to marry.  And once they do get married, they stop fucking the guy, which of course just leads to more problems for them to complain about, which in the end really could be the actual solution to the problem as what guys really want to fuck those bitches anyway.

Nowadays, if a guy doesn't take the "Mystery Method" course on how to con women into sexing him up, he generally doesn't stand a chance to have a good time with a woman for free, and thus must make more money to pay for his good time.  Men throw themselves into their work which sets off a vicious cycle of the aformentioned nagging woman syndrom because their man isn't at home begging for sex he isn't going to get.  This cycle really must be broken or we hasten the decline of civilization. 

The problem is so severe that sirens and red lights should have went off when President Bill Clinton had to settle for a hummer from a chubby intern in the White House.  Some things just aren't right.  A President should have movie starlets and models stopping buy to throw him a little love.  Somehow, the victim in this case, ended up getting impeached, while the pussitocrator got a quarter million dollar a year job hocking beauty products that don't even make her look good.

The most disturbing effect of the breakdowns in the system are that our nation's core leadership are increasingly falling prey to the trap.  Whether it is a Congressman in a Minnasota airport rest room, a President with the aforementioned chubbahummer, a southern preacher with a gay hooker or a now sitting Governor tatting a piece of for hire tang, the implications are potentially devestating to society.  Which sexually frustrated pol will fall to the temptation of sex for hire next?  Could the next President be at risk for an orgy?  Will the sexually repressed moral majority (really a vocal minority) cause anymore increases in prostitution?  At what point will sexual repression be elevated to the use of weaponry for political ends?

What many buy-side analysts believe to be occuring now is that women are creating a market for pussy that is approaching bubble territory.  By fucking the same guys, and not spreading the action around, e.g. stimulating demand while regulating supply, the price of pussy is sky-rocketing.  This market manipulation is making prostitution extremely lucrative.  Middle class guys are even finding hookers hard to resist despite the bubble pricing because of the returns they hear their friends are getting.

Irritated wives and girlfriends have been heard complaining about the bubble as they have less money to shop and less control over their man's time.  Maybe, just maybe, women ought to shut the fuck up and swallow the guppy a little more often.  And when they are done taking care of their man, remind their younger hussy friends to not fuck the guy they heard their other friend just broke up with, and rather, fuck that guy's friend who was always just hanging around. (Editor's note: The Real Wisconsin News does not promote promiscuity.  However, ladies, we know you are doing it, so for gawd's sake, jump into a different part of the gene pool than your friends if you are single, or do a reverse cowgirl for your man once in awhile, otherwise, you are in fact supporting the prostitution trade.)

Spitzer's unfortunate downfall is just another in a long list of sexcapades for the sex starved, and another welcome distraction for the crooks on Wall Street and in Washington, as well as, a wonderful box to stand on for NY Assembly Rebulican leader James Tedisco.  In reality, Spitzer is just a symptom of a greater problem, pussy control.

Friday, December 02, 2016 7451
Real Wisconsin News has made it official policy to extend our thoughts and prayers to you at this difficult time. We know you are suffering, and we realize that a real discussion might help you to cope with how you feel, but we would rather offer thoughts and prayers. The thoughts have now moved on to a top ten list of amazing photos we never knew existed. The prayers were more of a metaphor from the start. Both were offered because that is what will make you believe you are special to us, so please allow us to reiterate our desire to submit our thoughts and prayers to you and your loved ones. Bob Costas may or may not have coined the use of thoughts and prayers to express his deepest sympathy after the 1989 San Francisco earthquake. However, by the mid 1990s, thoughts and prayers were being sent out by all local and national media, as well as nearly 9 in 10 politicians. Bill Clinton, after realizing that saying he felt others' pain was seen as disingenuous, began offering thoughts and prayers. By 2001, the United States was so entrenched in offering thoughts and prayers that no other form of sympathy would be offered until a little known newscaster a decade later said that he knew his thoughts and prayers were not enough to offer in the wake of yet another school shooting. The media was briefly thrown into turmoil as it looked for something more appropriate following monthly disasters requiring thoughts and prayers. However, no replacement has been articulated since the initial shockwave and indictment. Donald Trump will, no doubt, be expected to grieve with Americans when people are maimed or killed. As a candidate who won based on negating political correctness, many have asked whether he will continue using thoughts and prayers to empathize with his fellow Americans. There is a movement in the NBA, where names are often shortened, to abbreviate thoughts and prayers to TnP, as in, "Hey, man, I heard your cousin died. TnP, DJ." With Trump's preference for Twitter over press conferences, it's possible Americans will see something like this: School shooting was a horrible disaster. Teachers need guns. #TnP to all. I'm having steak for dinner #Trumprules Until Trump does shake up how we offer condolences, Real Wisconsin News would like to offer our continuous thoughts and prayers for the following situations affecting your lives: Natural disasters, cancer or disease, financial troubles, death of a loved one, getting shot, being bullied, erectile dysfunction, deployed soldiers, accidents, general pain, divorce, and your choice of any other heartbreaking situation for which we sincerely offer our thoughts and prayers. We, by rule, do not offer thoughts or prayers to those who are foreigners (unless attacked by terrorists or natural disaster), those who are incarcerated, or those who cause the situation for which we are offering said thoughts and prayers.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007 9093
Following on the heels of Bulemic Barbie's rehab, Mattel is dealing with a seriously diseased Elmo. Apparently Elmo has ingested large quantities of lead , leaving him partially mentally retarded.

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