Anne Balentine was a fan-favorite back in the 1990s on Milwaukee's Channel Four. Nothing seemed out-of-the-ordinary with her, and I blissfully watched the news until one day my friend told me she had a prosthetic arm.

 

I couldn't help but watch the arm after that day. We should all be bigger than that, but I wondered things like: How far up did it go? Did she take it off at night? If Mike Gousha made an unwanted pass at her and she slapped him with it, could she knock him out?

Anne was a pleasant newscaster and an inspiration to people with disabilities. In fact, she gave me hope that I could someday appear on the news, even though I was slightly overweight, had more than my share of facial acne, and sported more chest hair than the post-1970s average newscaster. Wherever you are Anne, thank you.

Today, Anne is possibly a spokeswoman for a local hospital, but that could be some other Anne Ballentine, I suppose.

Anne, if you're reading this, please buy my book:

Saturday, January 24, 2015 10794
I didn’t read the babe’s blog, but I guess she’s probably decent looking, or else no one would have cared that she was going to stop wearing yoga pants or spandex or whatever. Am I right? If some 300 pounder or some crack addict wanted to find Christ and stop looking and acting disgusting, no one cares, but when some hot Christian mom decides to cut her husband off from some eye candy, we’re all going to weigh in on it. Had that same hot Christian wife started a porn website or murdered her husband, it would have had pretty much the same effect. The point is, even a sexy Christian woman wants to NOT call attention to her assets, she has to get rid of what makes her sexy. If not, she’s just wasting what God gave her and kidding herself.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007 10045
Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis is reportedly preparing for his potential ten-year prison term for tax evasion by buying a video camera. The same type of cutting-edge reality nude adventures he captured of college girls in need of attention will be filmed in the prison, with a working title of Guys Gone Wild: Prison Life Uncensored. Men serving time for crimes will be lured into exposing themselves to the camera for cigarettes and phone cards. Women and curious men will be treated to all kinds of wild situations, shower scenes, weightlifting, and the occasional beat-down. Instead of well-endowed college females, the camera will capture well-tattooed males coyly avoiding anything wild until enticed with enough tobacco to get wild.

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