An incomplete list and incoherent archive of the happenings in the race to finally replace George W. Bush.

Hillary Clinton suggests that Barack Obama be his boy and take the number 2 seat until he's all grown up.

Mike Huckabee drops out of race and considers position with "Evangelical Scamming Enterprises, LTD."

John McCain considers teammates from Keating Five for Vice President.

Hillary Clinton wins popular in Texas, Ohio and Rhode Island, suggesting Barack Obama isn't that popular with grown ups.

God suggests Mike Huckabee drop out of race and stop telling people they talk.

Mitt Romney dropped out of the Republican race with an impassioned speech that appealed to both self-absorbed rich guys and conservatives who don't know why they are conservative.

Super Tuesday not as climatic as Super Sunday, but Strahan gets much deserved MVP.

Obama not acting black at all according to several white commentators.

John Edwards parts hair, leads his people to fifth consecutive humbling defeat, quits bid for messiah.

Fred Thompsen dropped out of the Presidential race, seems more upbeat.

Hillary Clinton changes stance on barefoot, cookie making motherhood Milfdom, considers Salma Hayek as running mate.

Various inner-city self appointed angry black men leaders very upset that Obama is acting like he's "all that."

South Carolinians put black mark on primary with 71% of African Americans not voting for Hillary Clinton despite Bill and Hillary's finger waiving.

Mitt Romney swears he's not bought and paid for by rich right wing Republican elites, says his butler.

Mike Huckabee claims moral victories as happily as moral majority nods of approval.

Neo-Cons to IPO: Seek capital to buy Presidential Election again, considering Cheney/Rumsfeld ticket.

John McCain gains McGruff the Crime Dog's endorsement.

Wednesday, November 23, 2016 12589
Saturday Night Live's Colin Jost joked that Tinder's move to make 37 gender identity options available was why Hillary lost the election. A Romper article made the argument, in majestically ivory towerish tones, that it's unfair to blame the results of the election on "a hurting, marginalized community with a history of collective trauma and erasure from the national discourse, staggering murder rates, and housing, employment, and legislative discriminations at every turn." EXACTLY Jost's point from the outset. 90% of Americans think 37 gender identity options is moronic. HALF of those people still voted for Hillary. 98% of Americans think pretentious articles written by LGBTQ+&# advocates are way more annoying than Donald Trump. 1% did not understand the question.
Saturday, May 28, 2011 6894
So the thought of a tofu steak doesn’t have that same red meat ring to it for you either. This writer has learned of a possible business venture that is being run by the portly 1 st baseman of the Brewers team. After seeing Ryan Braun’s current ventures into local eateries, William Brewski is seeing dollar signs and is hoping to get the Brewers slugger to sign on.

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