Dear Biker Chick, I invited all of my friends to a party at my house recently, and almost none of them got back to me, even though I asked for an RSVP. It’s not like I did some afterthought of an email invite; I sent most of them actual letters! I had to overbuy on the food and especially beer, just in case some of my friends brought their alcoholic boyfriends. Has etiquette disappeared so much and is there anything I can do? Alice in West Allis Dear Stally Ally, If you were really popular in high school and maintained that through college in a sorority and then married a rich husband, then you wouldn’t have to worry about this kind of crap. Everyone would want to come over to your McMansion and eat lobster. If you were a burnout and a slut in high school and then got a job in retail before marrying a loser, I know where you’re coming from, and your friends will always attend any party you throw if they’ve got nothing else going on. Don’t expect a reply, and definitely don’t bother with mail—most people probably thought you were rubbing their noses in the fact that they’re still living at home or in some sleazy apartment instead of in their own houses. Send them an email next time and quit your complaining. If you got three people to show up, that’s enough to prove you’ll have someone attend your funeral someday. Stick the food in the freezer and drink the booze until you feel better about the whole thing. And by all means, when they invite you to their house someday, don’t respond, and then either show up trashed and flirt with all the married men or just don’t show up at all if you find something better to do.

Let us talk about the underhanded, understated, under-the-table problem of racial bias in selling homes. Have you seen this? I said, have you seen this? A white lady from a low-crime, highly-maintained white neighborhood in Milwaukee had the audacity coupled with the capacity to ask if a person looking to buy her house was black. Now, I'm sure she is a nice Christian white lady, but let me ask you, does the Bible say to love your neighbor only if he's white? Does the Bible say to not covet your neighbor's wife unless she's black? No my brother, and sister. The Bible says nothing about racial bias, because if it said racial bias was OK, then we'd all be free to do it with the blessing of God. But the Bible doesn't say racial bias is right. Not once. Not at all.